Caption This (Special Edition)
Sorry fellas but I didn't pick a winner for last week's caption contest....I'm revamping, and doing a take on "Chuck Norris facts". You are welcomed to contribute, either a Chuck fact or a Huck fact. Here are ones that I've compiled, many based off of existing ones:
- Huck to Chuck: "Is it true you are going to sue Fred Thompson, because "Law and Order" are trademarked names for your left and right legs?"
- Chuck to Huck: "For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For myself, each testicle is larger than the other one."
- Huck: "Did you watch 60 Minutes last night? Chuck: "Sure did! Watched the whole program in under 20 minutes."
- Chuck to Huck: "Do you know why they didn't find a weapon of mass destruction in Iraq? Because I've never stepped foot over there."
- Chuck to Huck: "I have to be honest: Your last campaign speech was so boring, I swallowed an entire bottle of sleeping pills...and it actually made me blink."
- Chuck to Huck: "Did I ever tell you about the time I auditioned for the role of "The Terminator"? James Cameron decided to give the part to Schwarzenegger, telling me that if he had given it to me, they'd be filming a documentary."
- Huck: "Why is your show called, 'Walker: Texas Ranger'?" Chuck: "Because, unlike you, I refuse to run."
- Huck to Chuck: "What President Roosevelt actually said, was "There's nothing to fear, but fear itself...and Chuck Norris."
- Chuck to Huck: "What President Roosevelt actually said, was "There's nothing to fear, but fear itself...and a Huckabee Administration."
- There are only two kinds of voters: Those who vote for Huck; and those who are killed by Chuck.
- There is no such thing as a lesbian; just a woman who has never met Chuck Norris. There is no such thing as a RINO; just a Republican who has never met Mike Huckabee.
- Chuck and Huck agree: There is no such thing as evolution...Just a long list of animals Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
- Huck: "What was going through Howard Dean's mind when he let out that death-curdling scream? Chuck: "My boot."
- Huck: "What exactly is a weapon of mass destruction? Chuck: "A Chuck Norris roundhouse kick."
- Huck: "Is it true that you're hung like a horse?" Chuck: "No; but it's true that horses are hung like me."
- Huck: "How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck Norris?"
- The only reason Huckabee's campaign has gone this far, is because Chuck Norris kick-started it with a roundhouse.
- Chuck to Huck: "Did you know that I was born in a round house that I built with my own two hands?"
- Huck: "Thanks for breathing some life into my campaign." Chuck: "I don't breath! I hold air hostage in my lungs!"
- Huck: "What if I'm asked in the next debate to explain the 'Theory of Relativity'? What do I say?" Chuck: "Tell them when you get kicked by a Chuck Norris roundhouse, even your relatives will feel it....and that's no theory!"
- Who can kill the audience quicker? Huck on the bass, or Chuck being a badass?
- Chuck croons: "These boots are made for walking, and that's just what they'll do one of these days these boots are gonna walk all over you....followed by a roundhouse kick!"
- Huck to Chuck: "Did you have to punch and kick everyone out on the dance floor?" Chuck to Huck: "They were holding up Romney '08 signs."
Huck to Chuck: "Oh....well, that changes things."
- Huck didn't win Iowa: Chuck Norris won Iowa. Chuck didn't lose New Hampshire and Michigan: Huck lost New Hampshire and Michigan.
- Huck to Chuck: "I'm nervous...I have to take a written quiz on Pakistan. What do I do?!" Chuck to Huck: "If it were me taking the quiz, I'd just put "violence" down for each answer."
Huck to Chuck: "How the hell does that get you an A+?"
Chuck to Huck: "I'm Chuck Norris. I answer all of my problems with violence."
- When Chuck Norris wants to see a true conservative, he looks in the mirror. When Mike Huckabee wants to see a true conservative, he looks at Chuck Norris.
Can you guys come up with any?
New ones will be added on here:
- Huck fact: Huckabee actually does believe in the theory of evolution: in youth, one thinks with his heart, and is liberal; with age, evolves and thinks with his head, and is known as a conservative