Anti-ACLU Post + Veteran's Day Post = Joke of the Day
To kind of tie my last two posts together (veterans and the ACLU- otherwise, unrelated), I saw this at Mariestwocents a while back, and remember receiving it in an e-mail forward before as well (of course, this one's more updated).
AMEN!!!
Two things Navy SEALS are always taught:
1. Keep your priorities in order
2. Know when to act without hesitation
A college professor, an avowed atheist and active in the ACLU, was teaching his class. He shocked several of his students when he flatly stated that once and for all he was going to prove there was no God.
Addressing the ceiling he shouted: "GOD, if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform. I'll give you exactly 15minutes!!!!!
The lecture room fell silent. You could hear a pin drop.
Ten minutes went by. "I'm waiting God, if you're real knock me off this platform!!!!"
Again after 4 minutes, the professor taunted God saying, "Here I am,
God!!! I'm still waiting!!!"
His count down got down to the last couple of minutes when a SEAL, Just released from the Navy after serving in Afghanistan and Iraq and Newly registered in the class, walked up to the Professor.
The SEAL hit him full force in the face, and sent the Professor tumbling from his lofty platform. The Professor was out cold!! The students were stunned and shocked. They began to babble in confusion. The SEAL nonchalantly took his seat in the front row and sat silent. The class looked at him and fell silent...waiting.
Eventually, the professor came to and was noticeably shaken. He looked at the SEAL in the front row. When the professor regained his senses and could speak he asked: "What the hell is the matter with you? Why did you do that"?
"God was really busy, protecting America's soldiers, who are protecting your right to say stupid stuff and act like a cakehole, so he sent me!!"
AMEN!!!
Two things Navy SEALS are always taught:
1. Keep your priorities in order
2. Know when to act without hesitation
A college professor, an avowed atheist and active in the ACLU, was teaching his class. He shocked several of his students when he flatly stated that once and for all he was going to prove there was no God.
Addressing the ceiling he shouted: "GOD, if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform. I'll give you exactly 15minutes!!!!!
The lecture room fell silent. You could hear a pin drop.
Ten minutes went by. "I'm waiting God, if you're real knock me off this platform!!!!"
Again after 4 minutes, the professor taunted God saying, "Here I am,
God!!! I'm still waiting!!!"
His count down got down to the last couple of minutes when a SEAL, Just released from the Navy after serving in Afghanistan and Iraq and Newly registered in the class, walked up to the Professor.
The SEAL hit him full force in the face, and sent the Professor tumbling from his lofty platform. The Professor was out cold!! The students were stunned and shocked. They began to babble in confusion. The SEAL nonchalantly took his seat in the front row and sat silent. The class looked at him and fell silent...waiting.
Eventually, the professor came to and was noticeably shaken. He looked at the SEAL in the front row. When the professor regained his senses and could speak he asked: "What the hell is the matter with you? Why did you do that"?
"God was really busy, protecting America's soldiers, who are protecting your right to say stupid stuff and act like a cakehole, so he sent me!!"
posted by The WordSmith from Nantucket at 11/12/2005 06:51:00 AM
7 Comments:
What an insult to our veterans. (AND to education.)
Do you find it funny that al-Qaeda followers commit their violence because "Mohammed sent me?"
If this is the best you can do to demonstrate there is a god, you should hang your head in shame.
Obviously, you miss MY point in the humor of it.
I'm not religious. Thanks for presuming, though.
Religion was never mentioned. Read your post and my comment again.
There's more hate than humor in this post.
You say you are not "religious" but it seems you believe in a god ... can you clarify this?
And please say it's not really OK to punch out atheists.
Religion was never mentioned. Read your post and my comment again.
No. But I read both of your comments before responding, and you seem to have a real ax to grind with religion. I probably share in some of your opinions on it; but not enough to align myself with militant atheists on their own jihad against those who do believe.
There's more hate than humor in this post.
Perhaps you see it this way because you're on the receiving end of it?
You say you are not "religious" but it seems you believe in a god ... can you clarify this?
I'll have to get back to you on this after I'm dead. Call me?
Oh, nevermind: I'll know where to find you; I'll just come haunt you, 'k? K.
And please say it's not really OK to punch out atheists.
It's a joke. Lighten up. In many cases, it's not ok to punch anyone (even atheists- there! I said it). (^_^)
The humor I find in it, is the arrogance of the professor saying there is no God. And presuming to teach it to a classroom, when he probably has no business pushing HIS beliefs onto his students. It'd be just as wrong if he were trying to proslytize to his class.
"God works in mysterious ways" as they say. No one expects the ground to just open up and swallow the guy (unless you're, say, a Muslim who believed Hurricane Katrina is a terrorist sent by Allah). If there is a God, obviously we haven't seen him work miracles like that.
I don't think it's inconceivable to believe that the theory of evolution (and yes, it's just a theory, and an incomplete one at that)and the existence of a God are incompatible.
Evolution could just as well be the Hand of God, working his magic.
The soldier claiming, "God was busy, so he sent me" is funny. You can look at it a few ways: There really isn't a God, but the fact that the Professor got his comeuppance anyway, is the reverse of him proclaiming, "If God is real, he'll strike me down." Knowing full well the likelihood of that is nil. It'd be like me saying, I have second sight. "I can predict the future: I predict I'm going to scratch myself in 10 seconds" and do. Or proclaim how "I predict the sun will rise in the east tomorrow morning" and it does. Does that prove I am a soothsayer? No. Those are nonsense statements.
Another way of looking at it is the soldier really did do God's work. Who's to really say? Who's to really know?
Welcome to my blog, btw, my fellow heathen!
My fellow heathen,
Indeed, you are unique in that you are not the "god-fearing" reactionary military type. I'm guessing that you, like me, put your country before any god. I tip my civilian hat to you for that.
I like a good self-deprecating joke (Like the one about the atheist and the bear), but, to me at least, your joke (Amen!) offends on many levels: it makes the troops look like bellicose bufoons, promotes resistance to science education, and implies it's OK to smack down atheists.
But of course I will support and defend your right to tell jokes!
Thanks for agreeing to disagree!
Now that was beautiful. It was a sight I would have liked to have seen!
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